From 1995 to mid 1999, before the Internet (okay, the Internet existed, if you call an AOL subscription and dial-up connection "the Internet"--more like, the Intermittenet), Joe James wrote reviews of films he saw in theatres, on VHS (snicker) and The Movie Network. They were contained on "BOB", Microsoft's bizarre attempt at personalizing the home computer environment in a family friendly way. Unfortunately, the program wasn't very user friendly, as there was no means to transfer the information out of the program. No thought of copying, cutting and pasting, or saving to disk (not even floppy disk). So, for a decade, it was presumed that those reviews were lost in time, or at least to Y2K.
UNTIL NOW!!
Here are the lost reviews, written under the alias King Lothar (don't ask--a combination of a Saturday Night Live character and BOB's requirement for identification), from a century ago. They have been unwittingly placed upon this nefarious day, known as Feb. 29th, also known as the Leap Day. ENJOY!
2.29.2012
29th Street
Starring: Danny Aiello, Anthony LaPaglia
Running Time: 1h 41min
The true story of the first New York State Lottery Winner is told with just the right mix of heart and comedy by Gallo. Inspired performances by all the cast really give this movie its heart. The relationship between the son and the father is very real.
The fact that he was a lotto winner is hardly the factor here, an an ordinary guy's life makes for interesting drama. This movie seems so true to life that when a certain unbelievable incident occurs, it's hard to believe it really happened.
Gallo has a way of finding humour in situations, and is especially good with animals. I feel kind of biased rating this movie [I met Gallo when I was a teenager and was invited to the set of Trapped in Paradise] but Gallo does have a talent at writing about real life drama, with the comedy that does come out of it.
Grade: B
8mm
Directed by: Joel Schumacher
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Catherine Keener, Joaquin Phoenix
Running Time: 2h 00min
Disturbing and not forgiving, this film looks at the seedy underworld of sick porn. It's truly amazing how the lead and director slowly delve into this world and soon find themselves trapped, struggling hard to claw their way back to the surface.
The direction follows Cage well on his downward spiral, and the excitement is in not knowing just how far he'll sink, and if he'll ever come back. Written by the same guy who wrote "Seven", we never know what to expect.
Unfortunately, I expected more, as the film seems to walk a fairly straightforward path towards its conclusion. Phoenix is great in what could have been a thankless role. Great to watch for its untouched subject matter and the performance of Cage.
Grade: B-
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Catherine Keener, Joaquin Phoenix
Running Time: 2h 00min
Disturbing and not forgiving, this film looks at the seedy underworld of sick porn. It's truly amazing how the lead and director slowly delve into this world and soon find themselves trapped, struggling hard to claw their way back to the surface.
The direction follows Cage well on his downward spiral, and the excitement is in not knowing just how far he'll sink, and if he'll ever come back. Written by the same guy who wrote "Seven", we never know what to expect.
Unfortunately, I expected more, as the film seems to walk a fairly straightforward path towards its conclusion. Phoenix is great in what could have been a thankless role. Great to watch for its untouched subject matter and the performance of Cage.
Grade: B-
Addicted to Love
Starring: Matthew Broderick, Meg Ryan, Kelly Preston, Tcheky Karyo
Running Time: 1h 40min
Well, it took many, many years and the same format but Meg Ryan managed to impress me again in this unique romantic comedy. She's so good when she's not playing ditzy cute blond and has a backbone instead, making things happen instead of having things happen to her. Broderick finds a grown up role that allows him to use the talents that made Ferris Bueler so funny. The silliness of the film's premise is played straight and makes the suspension of disbelief a pleasure as we watch the heartbroken couple watch the heartbreakers. The perfect blend of physical, situational. and spoken comedy is present, making it totally fresh and invigorating. A one-of-a-kind original that demands repeat viewings.
Grade: A
Air Force One
Starring: Harrison Ford, Gary Oldman, Glenn Close, William H. Macy
Running Time: 2h 04min
This movie walks a tightrope. Unfortunately it falls a few times only to get up and fall again. At first an 'A' movie, it managed to throw everything out the window in the last half hour and plummet to a 'B'. It was believable, fun, intriguing, and exciting right up until the jail scene. Then it was just overboard! Full of cliches, American propagandistic images, and absolutely no surprises. It really disappointed once it took the movie out of the hands of such great actors as Oldman and Ford to give the action fans their fix. With horrible supporting roles, especially the first family, no one cares about the outcome. Close and Macy are wasted in limited roles, but the beauty is watching Oldman and Ford face off, a thespian lover's dream.
Grade: B
Alien Resurrection
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Winona Ryder, Ron Perlman, Brad Dourif
Running Time: 1h 49min
What is a very stylish fourth installment of the Alien series is really not necessary. Sure, I enjoyed the visuals and Weaver in her role. But it seems that there is absolutely no new developments, less than Batman and Robin even!
Diappointingly, it has a great cast which is capable of much more than a recreation of the first movie with more aliens that move like Jurassic Park's raptors. A lot of money must have been put into the set design, which though appealing, offers a stagnant view of the action.
Why can't we get these aliens off spaceships and on to planets? A Fifth Element syle of Earth or anything? I see Alien 5 in the future and they'll probably go this route, but they may have bored the audience too early.
Grade: C+
American History X
Starring: Edward Norton, Edward Furlong, Faruza Balk, Beverly D'Angelo
Running Time: 2h 20min
A hard hitting, devastating, emotionally wrenching piece of art. Tony Kaye disowned this film over disputes about its ending and editing, which usually makes sense in the event of a poor unrealized film. However, this is not the case. This film is extremely powerful in performance and direction. The use of black and white, effectively trimmed cutting and narration both fictional and documentary style all amount to a masterpiece of film. Norton's performance is exquisite, subtle to explosive in a blink of an eye. Kaye's advertising background shows as he trims the fat and leaves us with a lean, mean, raw and edgy look at the changing of one Neo-Nazi and the danger that the life brings his family. A must see.
Grade: A
The Arrival
Starring: Charlie Sheen, Ron Silver, Teri Polo, Lindsey Crouse
Running Time: 1h 55min
The surprisingly thing about this movie is how poorly it did in theatres. Independence Day was good but you would think that it would only fuel more interest in this X-Files episode gone Hollywood. Sheen is interesting and plays straight in a movie that can be taken two ways. If yo feel like involving yourself, and truly believing in the government conspiracy/aliens among us idea you'll have a blast. It will have its tense moments and nifty special effects that you're looking for. On the other hand, if you get a laugh out of cheesy sci-fi movies, this movie will provide plenty of laughs. With the dialogue offering some classic cheese and the appearance of Sheen only brings images of Hot Shots and other such Zucker fare. Either way, it works!
Grade: B
As Good As It Gets
Starring: Jack Nicholson, Helen Hunt, Greg Kinnear, Cuba Gooding Jr.
Running Time: 2h 18min
All the actors sink into their roles, really doing more with them than what they're given. Kinnear especially shows his worth as a supporting actor who not only holds his own with the best in the biz (Ford, and now Nicholson) but sometimes upstaging them as is the case here. Nicholson is great as the obsessive-compulsive writer and actually pulls off the sexiness needed to make Hunt's interest in him truly believable. But the thing he doesn't do is satisfyingly pull off the transition from evil to good. It shouldn't be so black and white, but the inbetweens aren't really there. Which is a shame because the film is too long. Scenes don't end when they should and start a little too early. The changes of setting does little to alter that. Blame Brooks.
Grade: B-
At First Sight
Starring: Val Kilmer, Mira Sorvino, Steven Weber
Running Time: 2h 10min
At First Sight is at first sight a romantic lead pairing so steamy you don't need to see it to imagine the heat between the two hot leads. And right off the bat the sexual dynamic is explored. Eventually that gives way to the friendship that forms between these two and how Sorvino aids Kilmer in regaining his sight through surgery. Based on a true story it is both compelling and romantic. However, many moments seem too movie of the week, too dipped in sentimental goo and melodrama. The leads are extremely photogenic, so much so that they don't seem to mix well together, getting in each other's way. Many interesting dilemmas are raised and tackled well, and if you can weed through the sappiness a good film awaits.
Grade: B-
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
Starring: Mike Myers, Elizabeth Hurley, Mimi Rogers, Michael York, Rob Lowe
Running Time: 1h 29min
Myers is funny as usual and really works well with Hurley. She actually makes a thankless role truly her own. It's hard to decide if Myers is funnier as the hero or the villain. And as usual, it's the mocking of old filmmaking techniques that give this film its best laughs. From the eight-way split screens to the zooms to the villain to the dance segues. Though not laugh out loud funny throughout the film, there are some hysterical moments, such as "Who does Number 2 work for!" I think this is definitely the type of movie that will get funnier upon further viewing. Viewing of not just the film itself, but old James Bond films and other such spy movies. Just the unfreezing of Powers gets funnier after watching Dr. No again.
Grade: A-
Bachelor Party
Starring: Tom Hanks, Tawny Kitten, Adrian Zmed, George Gizzard
Running Time: 1h 45min
If there is a movie that leaves no question it was made in the eighties, it's this one! It is unbelievable that Hanks actually went on from this to win back to back Oscars! A typical teenage comedy with unintentionally hilarious eighties styles, this movie definitely provides laughs. However, most of them are at the movie, not with the movie. Hanks is surrounded by the stereotypical teenagers, preppie, nerd, drunkard, etc. and the plot is so lame I'm amazed that the movie actually lasted over an hour and a half. Big laughs result from just how far the movie goes for laughs but all in all it's just an excuse to show a wild party and a number of women topless. NO talent necessary to make this film.
Grade: D+
Batman & Robin
Starring: George Clooney, Chris O'Donnell, Alicia Silverstone, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Running Time: 1h 53min
Not only does this movie substitute story line and interesting dialogue for fantastic sets and special effects, it also manages to take one of the best Batman villains to grace the sixty years worth of comic books and make him nothing more than a grunting musclebound freak. The same goes for the whole movie. What originally has intellectual significance becomes nothing more than a way for Hollywood to flex its $100 million budget. Clooney and O'Donnell work wonders together, the only highlight of the film. All the other actors do well with their parts. It's just that Schumacher has just totally destroyed everything that is Batman. You'd think that his only knowledge of the Bat comes from the 60's TV series. It's time for a new director! Or else!
Grade: B-
Battleship Potemkin
Starring: Alexander Antonov, Vladimir Barsky
Running Time: 1h 05min
There is no denying the importance of this film. That is for certain. But another thing is that it is interesting, even for today's audiences. I was totally invested from the start, and this can be attributed to the fantastic cutting. It's hard to believe how much of a breakthrough this must have been. The mutiny build-up is fantastic, as is the Odessa Steps sequence of course. There is a little lull inbetween the steps sequence and the tension when the battleship encounters another fleet of ships. But this is only because of how exhilarating the step sequence is. The fact that this film has no real star or center character, yet still manages to make you care, keep you interested, shows how effective the editing was and how much it gives to our cinematic experience today.
Grade: B+
Beautiful Girls
Starring: Matt Dillon, Uma Thurman, Rosie O'Donnell, Mira Sorvino, Timothy Hutton
Running Time: 1h 53min
The only thing that this movie gets right is the title. There are a lot of beautiful girls in this movie. Too bad there isn't any beautiful writing or scenery or dialogue or characters or acting or anything that can be deemed entertainment. I fell asleep during this one so I'm not even sure if it got any better. Sorry. See another review blog for this one.
Grade: D-
Beverly Hills Ninja
Starring: Chris Farley, Nicollette Sheridan, Chris Rock, Robin Shou
Running Time: 1h 45min
Yet another slapstick comedy from Farley which keeps things very very predictable and therefore not funny. We've seen ALL these jokes before and done better. The only thing that keeps things interesting is that we do like Farley. There's just something about him that keeps you watching. But without a good straight man to play off of his schikt, it just doesn't work as well. It's hard to laugh at such contrived events. There are only a few real laugh out loud moments. Even the karate isn't all that interesting or exciting. The one thing that I'd love to see though is a sequel with Chris Rock as the legendary Black ninja. Now that would be funny!
Grade: C
Big Night
Starring: Stanley Tucci, Minnie Driver, Isabella Rossellini, Tony Shalhoub
Running Time: 1h 47min
This movie is fun to watch, with bits of humour tossed about two brothers from Italy and their failing restaurant. Minnie Driver has never looked so beautiful, holding her own opposite screen legend Rossellini. However, it seems like this movie could have been a short film. The content doesn't warrant feature length, as it's proven throughout the film with what seems like unnecessary scenes or simple scenes dragged on or just overdone. The most convincing argument for this are the silent, from speech that is, scenes. These scenes say so much more, especially the last five minutes. Those last few minutes seem to say so much more than the rest of the film. The beauty of the food preparation and the silent interaction. A contrast of countries?
Grade: B
Billboards
Starring: The Joffrey Ballet
Running Time: 1h 20min
The film version of the Joffrey Ballet production entitled "Billboards" is captivating. What the ballet loses in video translation the director makes up for with close-ups and inserts, dissolves and superimposing. The effect is a ballet unlike any put on before, in a way you've never seen before. Set to the music of Prince, the ballet balances between traditional steps and modern dance. The costumes are extravagant and suit each choreographer's piece well. The interpretations of the music are beautiful in the bodies of the graceful, elegant, yet so strong and powerful ballet troupe. This video presentation is great to see the composure maintained on their faces, as well as the shots from stage left and right. Only being there live would be greater.
Grade: B+
Blue Velvet
Starring: Kyle MacLachlan, Isabella Rossellini, Dennis Hopper, Laura Dern
Running Time: 2h 00min
An often times hilarious, often times frightening experience, Lynch's film paints two different pictures of small town America. Paints, being the key verb, as the actors are his canvas and do well in bringing his odd commentary alive. Performances drive the film in a setting that alters from their actions. The uneasy humour that derives from the greatest fears is counterbalanced with the sickening feeling that all's too well. the best way to describe this film is to use a line from the film itself: "I don't know if you're a detective or a pervert." This film asks the audience what they are, and if we should expose and explore the two feelings. Lynch weaves magic images and performances, the perverted detective that he is.
Grade: B
Boogie Nights
Starring: Mark Wahlburg, Burt Reynolds, Julianne Moore, John C. Reilly, William H. Macy, Phillip Seymour Hoffman
Running Time: 2h 35min
This movies takes you on a wonderful ride full of characters, images, sights and sounds that will leave you breathless and exhilarated. The acting is superb, with many hilarious yet extremely heartbreaking performances, notably Macy and Hoffman. This is the best film direction I've seen in awhile from a sophomore director. He borrows heavily from classic 70s directors but in a loving and unique combination, ushering in the new crew of directors that grew up on such great 70s fare. From the opening shot that lasts about three minutes to several eye-pleasing tracking and dolly shots, the film's length is never felt. Your involvement in the characters is deep as you feel everything that they feel. The most heartwarming is the portrait at the end.
Grade: A
Breakdown
Starring: Kurt Russell, J.T. Walsh, Kathleen Quinlan, M.C. Gainey
Running Time: 1h 33min
Walsh's last role is a minimal one but he definitely acts creepy and questionable. And that's the problem with the film is that EVERYthing is creepy and questionable. What starts out as Deliverance: The Sequel quickly becomes the breakdown of Russell. Along the way he is thrown clues, thrown red herrings, and thrown around. He plays the tole well but there are way too many motives and actions left unaccountable. And I guess that's the way it would be in real life but it really leaves the viewer unsatisfied. Still, if you're looking for suspense and action in the B-movie style there's plenty of that here. Plenty of stunts and scary moments, which eventually mount to a well done B-movie.
Grade: B-
Bride of Chucky
Starring: Jennifer Tilly, Brad Dourif, John Ritter, Kathy Najimy
Running Time: 1h 30min
A hilarious self-mocking installment of the little doll that could, thanks in part to the post-Scream boom in horror films. And thankfully so. This series has never been more fun than in this age where horror films are appreciated for what they are, solid entertainment. I don't think I've had this much fun at a horror movie since I donned 3D glasses for A Nightmare on Elm Street 3. Having another doll for Chucky to play off of was brilliant, but the sex scene was just pure genious! In fact, the whole kid's toy coming to life to kill thing is better here than anywhere. Small Soldiers certainly could have used some of the gimmicks this film did. Truly a pleasure, you can be sure I'll be there to see Son of Chucky.
Grade: B
Bulletproof
Starring: Damon Wayans, Adam Sandler, James Caan, Kristen Wilson
Running Time: 1h 24min
The third buddy pick, cop team action comedy I watched in a weekend, this film managed to hold its own. Sandler is funny, yet still hits the dramatic notes, even if it takes numerous shouting incidents. Caan could be used better but the film is too short to do so. For some reason they would rather constantly remind us of the relationship between Sandler and Wayans. It's as if they scripted the movie for people who come in late at the theatre. It really gets aggravating. Given a better plot and setting these two could create a laugh riot. This film succeeds in only showing us what would be a great idea, without following through on it. Could have been better but it's still not bad.
Grade: C+
Chaindance
Starring: Michael Ironside, Rae Dawn Chong, Brad Dourif
Running Time: 1h 36min
One has to love what this film was trying to accomplish, a drama where a hardened inmate reconciles with an inmate of another sorts, a man hospitalized with cerebral palsy. The performances are as good as one could expect from B-list actors, enough to make it enjoyable and believable. Unfortunately, there are cliched moments and a completely unnecessary subplot just to spice up the sex and violence quota. If the film had stuck to the core it would have been more rewarding. That aside, Ironside gets to play a better role than he's usually reduced to. He sinks into the role and gives us the transformation the character needs but I can't help but see the Nicholson in his appearance and acting. A nice film that needed better direction.
Grade: C+
Chain Reaction
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Morgan Freeman, Rachel Weisz, Fred Ward
Running Time: 1h 46min
Well, Morgan Freeman's run of successful and interesting movies couldn't last forever. After starring in the best two movies of the past two years he is limited to play the same character that he played in Outbreak and without any other talent in the film he languishes in his own talent. Reeves is neither believable nor charismatic as the star of the film and we can thank him for not taking the Speed 2 role seeing as his acting abilities wouldn't help the fact that yet another dumb sequel is being made. Back to this movie, it suffers from traileritis, where the trailer promises action you've never seen before but the movie isn't half as exciting as the trailer. Hopefully, you'll have rented another movie with this preview and can save the $4.00.
Grade: C+
The Chamber
Starring: Chris O'Donnell, Gene Hackman, Faye Dunaway, Robert Prosky
Running Time: 1h 51min
John Grisham's lawyer books turned movies have officially become tiresome. Now I could have said this back when The Pelican Brief was first released but now it can't be denied. Grisham serves us yet another tale involving a young lawyer against all odds, fighting for justice, with the aid of a nice female helper. Should he be working for his client? Will he beat the odds? WHO CARES? There wasn't a single character in this movie that was worth caring for or even worth watching. O'Donnell is extremely stiff as he delivers his lines in the same tone, regardless of emotion. His handling of the big Grisham monologue is empty. Hackman is reduced to looking sad and then yelling. It's a shame that Grisham's films attract such great talent and hard-earned $$$.
Grade: D
Chasing Amy
Starring: Ben Affleck, Joey Lauren Adams, Jason Lee, Jason Mewes, Kevin Smith
Running Time: B+
Kevin Smith's apology to the critics who hated Mallrats at the end of the film sums up what is good and bad about this movie. The fact that Smith grew up a bit, took on some serious ground and peppered his unique funniness in an attempt to please those critics. The fact that he is trying to please those critics also takes away from the humour that is so abundant in his first two films. Granted, this isn't a full fledged comedy. It's comedy in the sense that it doesn't take itself too seriously. Extremely stunning performances by a cast that was used as side jokes in the first installments of the New Jersey trilogy really make the film. The blend of seriousness and comedy is great but not complete. This is a good transition film for Smith.
Grade: B+
Chili's Blues
Starring: Roy Dupuis, Lucie Laurier
Running Time: 1h 45min
This film starts off really annoying. The dubbing is irritating as the story doesn't focus on its main characters until later. Once this happens, do you ever get used to the voices, falling in love with the leads, no matter what they reveal or what actions they take. This must be adapted from a stage play as the set is limited and the situation contrived to let the circumstances unfold. Never has a female lead so enraptured me as Laurier. And Dupuis' boyish maturity contrasts so well with the mature girlishness of Luarier. The middle does tend to ask itself, where is this going but after a revealing statement the pace flourishes to the denouement. One thing is for certain, you have to LOVE the Life Saver magic and the unbridled joy it brings.
Grade: B+
Chinatown
Starring: Jack Nicholson, Faye Dunaway, John Huston, John Hillerman
Running Time: 2h 11min
A truly great script allows the viewer to comfortably sit back and watch the performers slowly unravel a compelling mystery. Very controlled performances come out of Polanski's direction, making the genre of film noir ease into the 70s. Nothing seems overcooked or typical. The scenery is stylish, the cars fantastic, and the wardrobe a wonderful sight. The only real problem is the pace at which the film moves. It's understandable why it builds the story, and the colours and performances help cut the film's long running time. Nothing flashy, which is good because it allows a good script to provide the satisfaction.
Grade: B+
Chinese Box
Directed by: Wally Wong
Starring: Jeremy Irons, Gong Li, Reuben Blades
Running Time: 1h 35min
Irons gives an inspired performance in a film where Hong Kong itself is a lead character. Irons is the foreigner trying to make sense of his place in life and in a strange land. Struck with Leukemia, he shifts his focuses inward and changes himself so that he changes others. The documentary style shooting gives the film historic realism, as Hong Kong is handed to the Chinese from the British. Love, power and business must change hands and the takeover must truly affect every resident, it is altering the life of Irons. The grittiness still can't make up for the slow pace however, and the film never seems to climax or pivot enough to truly move the viewer. Great scenes of Hong Kong and Irons' acting are the highlights of a slow moving film.
Grade: C+
City of Industry
Starring: Harvey Keitel, Stephen Dorff, Timothy Hutton, Wade Dominguez, Famke Janssen
Running Time: 1h 37min
A very slow, unevenly paced movie. It shows what happens before the action and after the action with absolutely no action. Relationships aren't fully developed, motives very unclear, and dialogue very simple for complex situations. There is a multitude of unnecessary shots, mostly of people driving around in cars, or sitting around waiting for something to happen. Then, when they are given something to do, we are whisked away to yet another character driving around doing nothing. Keitel is wasted, as is Janssen, whereas Dorff is given an interesting character but can't do anything with it due to lack of screen time, especially for a main protaganist. This movie was probably made of other movies' cutting room floor!
Grade: D+
Clockers
Starring: Harvey Keitel, Delroy Lindo, John Turturro, Mehki Phiffer
Running Time: 2h 09min
No one has more style to his films than Spike Lee. Some of it may be borrowed (from his executive producer no doubt) but the way he puts it all together is stunning. Some of it filmed in documentary style gives the subject matter added life, truly expressing the reality of it all. He adds old cinematic techniques to release the drama in the dynamite and tense emotional scenes. Then to make the film truly his own he adds his style. The mock video game which mimicks reel life (or is it the other way around?), the camera spinning around Strike, the reflection of Keitel in the eyeball, this movie has more impact than any hood film, Hollywood cop story, or mystery murder. Sure to become a classic in time.
Grade: A
Clueless
Starring: Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd
Running Time: 1h 37min
Heckerling gets everything right in this hilarious reworking of Jane Austen's Emma. The casting is perfect, in all aspects. The acting is thus perfect. The dialogue is delivered perfectly and the pacing is just brilliant and refreshing. Not in the MTV quick cutting style that Disney has tried to create recently. It just goes to show you what good can happen when a creative force like Heckerling gets a fair amount of control. On the other hand, poor Silverstone's character can't seem to get anything right in her attempts to fix all her friends' lives. She is perfect for this role, and may have a lot of difficulty trying to shake off the image that has come with it. With her talent it shouldn't be a problem. Instead of watching the show, buy this.
Grade: A-
Conspiracy Theory
Starring: Mel Gibson, Julia Roberts, Patrick Stewart, Cylk Cozart
Running Time: 2h 15min
Gibson gives a solid performance as the nut job who finds himself involved in a real conspiracy. Right from the start he has the audience and unfortunately things fall out of his hands and the audience is forced to endure way too much. As the film grows in length so too does the need to seriously suspend disbelief or else give up hope on the film. Roberts and Stewart are fine in their roles but the film drags and the extremely obvious attempts at humour come off lame. It's as if the writer had stored up some jokes he thought were funny and decided to drop them in the script periodically, just to destroy all packing and timing. This film could have gone somewhere, and almost did, but it eventually bent to Hollywood chase scenes and romance.
Grade: C
Contact
Starring: Jodie Foster, Matthew McConaughey, Tom Skerrit, James Woods
Running Time: 2h 29min
Foster is once again the focal point of two hours of thought provoking filmmaking. She's in almost every scene and her talent does not bore. We want more. All the circumstances seem realistic, enough so that a vivid discussion can follow the movie. However, at times I thought I was watching Forrest Gump all over again. The music swelling at the right moments, the grand shot placed at the right time for the perfect amount of time. The filmmaking is so precision that it lacks vision. Except the "journey" sequence, which gave a whole lot more than I expected, yet still leaving plenty to the imagination. Another problem is the intensity of the two stars' relationship, stemming from a one night stand! This movie gets better as time passes though.
Grade: B
Crash
Starring: James Spader, Deborah Kara Unger, Elias Koteas, Holly Hunter
Running Time: 1h 37min
It's unfortunate that this film was the center of so much controversy for all the wrong reasons. The sex scenes, which there are plenty, aren't what should be censored or argued over. They are actually done in good taste, very intricate and alluring in their harshness and realism. This is no soft porn. This is a film that has a deep underlying meaning. As to what it is, I'm not sure after one viewing. I can see conflictions between man and machine, love and danger, death and passion. The place of excitement and orgasm within all of that. The concepts of power and control and survival. It's all there. But putting it together is a task which the movie, though beautifully shot and acted, still seems muddy on first view. But a good one at that.
Grade: B-
Creature From the Black Lagoon (in 3D)
Starring: Richard Carlson, Julia Adams, Richard Denning
Running Time: 1h 20min
Classic horror brought to you in the best way. This laugh-a-thon in 3D makes you wonder why 3D never lasted, then gives you the answer at the same time. The dialogue is hokey, it seems like every single line is worth a laugh. The sexism throughout is hilarious in hindsight, as it is so blatant and obvious! The same goes for the caricatures of the natives, especially the captain of the boat. All this and I haven't even mentioned the creature! Surprisingly good for its time, the amount of underwater scenes are great. However, Gill-man can't quite seem to swim as graceful as you'd think he would. Oh, the same music that's supposed to strike fear, the helpless girl, the silly antics of the bedridden chum, all the macho posturing! Amazingly, it's all the same music.
Grade: A
Cruel Intentions
Starring: Ryan Phillippe, Reese Witherspoon, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Selma Blair
Running Time: 1h 35min
What harm can be done to such a fabulous tale? Phillippe tries hard to destroy this sinister tale but the likes of Gellar and Blair save it form his horrible acting. One cannot believe that any girl in her right mind would want a bump on a log with the personality of a chalkboard. However, Blair and Gellar, and Witherspoon for that metter, make things believable in that their desire and curiousity for sex could overcome that. Which allows Phillippe to portray the body that these girls revolve around. Gellar is fantastic, and Blair hilarious in an update that is thoughtful and invigorating. Someone forgot to tell Phillippe that it was set in present day however, as he tries to recreate Malkovich (as if he ever could!) A better male lead and it's a B+.
Grade: C+
Dante's Peak
Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Linda Hamilton, Charles Hallahan, Jamie Rene
Running Time: 1h 48min
What starts off initially as an intense, captivating disaster waiting to happen, quickly turns into a disaster once the movie leaves its attempt at originality and turns the characters and situations into boring, cliched melodramatic foils. The two leads may have possibly pulled it off as they are both believable yet have that little bit of fantasy that creates movie magic. But then that gets covered in ash as the studio tries to make too much of that movie magic in easily contrived disaster scenes and destruction for the sake of filling the trailer with exciting images. It's too bad that the trailer was the only excitement as we move through rescue after rescue with no worries at all. Absolutely nothing new to offer here. Just a cute leading couple.
Grade: C
Daylight
Starring: Sylvestor Stallone, Amy Brenneman, Stan Shaw, Jay O. Sanders
Running Time: 1h 54min
Well, I actually went and saw a Stallone flick and was impressed. The effects were great and Sly wasn't overly annoying thanks to his co-stars, who were. I guess my tiny repertoire of disaster flicks allowed me to enjoy this movie. The small group of survivors resembled a pack of Stephen King demographically mixed characters. I did find that the black characters were very negatively imaged save for one, who himself wasn't too competent and needed Sly's help to achieve anything. Maybe I enjoyed the evening more than the movie. I just basically had a good time and was really impressed at the fact that people who mattered actually died. The dog thing was ridiculous though!
Grade: B+
Dead Presidents
Starring: Larenz Tate, Chris Tucker, Keith David, Freddy Rodriguez
Running Time: 2h 00min
Sold as a bank robbery film, this totally original piece of filmmaking is really about the African American experience in the 70s. Vietnam, before the war and after, and the social situations many Black people found themselves in. The disillusionment that the whole country felt, yet seen through the eyes of a young Black man. The drama is heartfelt, and Tate really matures before our eyes, both as the character and as an actor. The war is dealt with ferociously, tackled with the fever that the Hughes try to emulate from their idols DePalma, Scorcese, and Coppola. A real character study that never leaves its mark. We are aware that this is just one story of one man, yet a story that was felt for many in the 70s.
Grade: B-
Deliverance
Starring: Jon Voight, Burt Reynolds, Ned Beatty, Ronny Cox
Running Time: 1h 49min
A tight little suspense action movie that owes a lot to the scenery and the scenery chewing performances of the lead actors. A quaint canoe trip seems a bit dangerous but the four "city boys" aren't prepared for what happens to them. A wonderful comment and look into human survival and instinct. I caught this one on TV so I'm sure that I missed a good thirteen minutes or so. Those missing minutes may explain the weird cuts and odd pacing of the film. The relevance of some of the villagers and their conditions seem to go unexplained, almost adding an "Island of Dr. Moreau" subplot that never emerges. A movie like this only leaves the viewer with a scary reminder the next time they find themselves lost in some unknown woods. Things can get worse.
Grade: B-
Dennis Miller: Citizen Arcane
Running Time: 1h 00min
A live performance where the crowd isn't really into it really hinders Miller's otherwise hilarious quips and allusions. He doesn't really help the cause either when he starts getting opinionated on all matters of controversy. This has always been his style but he used to mix comedy well with his opinions but this time, especially early in the act, he just seems like a cranky man. As for the audience, they seem to be lost on half his jokes, which Miller makes fun of, without them realizing. Hurt by the crowd, he comes off less funny than normal. Still, his fire-quick insults and comparisons are hilarious, as is his Jim J. Bullock comments. Nasty, yet so true, Miller is always entertaining, even if the audience isn't up to the task.
Grade: B-
Destiny Turns on the Radio
Starring: Dylan McDermott, Nancy Travis, Quentin Tarantino, James Belushi
Running Time: 1h 42min
Not your usual flick, this movie blends plot elements that are variations on a theme. From the lovers torn apart to the robbery gone wrong to a mystical entity controlling everyone's fate. With all these different ideas you'd think that the film would be different or unique in some way. It isn't. It isn't a bad movie, it's just that there isn't anything special. It's just a mediocre film that cashes in on Tarantino's desire to show his mediocre acting ability. Travis is sexy and could be used more effectively in a better film. The whole thing is very anti-climatic. The characters don't really go through any major development and the mystical part seems just that. It's a mystery as to why it's in the movie at all.
Grade: C-
The Devil's Advocate
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Al Pacino, Charlize Theron, Jeffery Jones
Running Time: 2h 24min
Pacino sinks his teeth into a role he was meant to play (no disrespect meant). Reeves and Theron find themselves lucky to share this script with him. It's fantastic! It would have rated an A+ if it weren't for those two actors and their inability to rise to Pacino's level (a tough task undoubtedly). The movie stays unsettling and scary but still manages to give us humour (in camp form) and psychological intrigue. What's at stake for Reeves still seems personal even though it means a whole lot more in the scheme of things, which allows the audience to be involved on multiple levels. The powerlessness of Reeves vs. the devil echoes the mass audience's own feelings but the thing that allows us to keep hope still remains. And it's not God for once!
Grade: A
Donnie Brasco
Starring: Johnny Depp, Al Pacino, Michael Madsen, Bruno Kirby, Anne Heche
Running Time: 2h 06min
A thespian lover's ideal pairing of one of today's greatest actors and tomorrow's best, as Pacino and Depp form an amazing relationship at the heart of what would be just another mob movie. Now mob movies are generally interesting and the reason why they usually hold strong to their audience is the combination of a good script, interesting characters, excellent acting, talented direction, and the portrayal of a different set of morals and lifestyles. This movie has all of that, as well as a constant presence of danger. Depp plays the role spendidly, really intertwining his character's relationship with Pacino. At first it seems forced, but as he grows in the movie you see that Depp purposely plays it that way. There isn't room for all my praise.
Grade: A
Dream with the Fishes
Starring: David Arquette, Brad Hunt, Cathy Moriarty, Kathryn Erbe
Running Time: 1h 37min
A strange film that uses the descriptive tagline that it's about "voyeurism, LSD, and nude bowling". Well, it certainly delivers what it promises. And it does so on the grounds that these are some of the things a man on his deathbed would like to do. It never tells us what he has, but it doesn't matter. It's the bizarre relationships that enfold from his sickness and the last days, and how in the face of death we decide we want to live. Arquette's character is truly loopy, with a very emotional core that makes him likable. The movie is shot very indie style but doesn't dumb down the situations, making them seem actually very possible (and enticing). The theme of love is dealt with coldly however, but perhaps it's a comment on society.
Grade: B
Drowning in Dreams
Starring: Fred Brehome
Running Time: 1h 20min
A fascinating story about a millionaire who throws all his money away in his crazed obsession with a sunken yacht is turned into a toned down exploration that creeps along with little interest. This is a story that can be tapped for great drama, suspense and an intriguing look into what drives us. Instead, it loses us by blandly giving us testimonies from people in a structure that strips them of their impact on each other's lives. A few good editing techniques are used but they could have been more effective. The underwater shots are dull. The fading out of the voice overs is mind boggling! Why? We WANT to hear their words! Interesting only because of the real life story and people, not because of the style and direction of the film.
Grade: C
Eddie
Starring: Whoopi Goldberg, Frank Langella, Dennis Farina, Richard Jenkins
Running Time: 1h 39min
Yet another dumb sports movie, only this time we get to see why sports movies haven't really changed in the years gone by. The only interesting moments of this movie is when the actual basketball players get to speak. And when they do they're funnier than Whoopi ever is. She should stick to being a comedic figure with dramatic movies, where her true talent shines through. This movie is supposed to be a comedy but Whoopi's energy is so low and draining that she can't carry the laughs on her own. Another great performance by the assistant coach, who seems to take minor roles and really give them some flavour. Overall, this movie had about three laughs, none of which came from Goldberg.
Grade: D+
EDtv
Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Jenna Elfman, Woody Harellson, Ellen DeGeneres, Elizabeth Hurley
Running Time: 2h 00min
An interesting depiction of what would happen if someone's life were broadcast live 24 hours a day. The commentary on our hypermediated society is both thought provoking and entertaining. Woody and Matthew appear to be brothers, and are cast well. In fact, the whole casting is tremendous, apart from Hurley, who though great in her role, would have been better if her character was an unknown (or on the level of Elfman at least). Howard, as always, mixes humour, family, and drama into a tight slice of real life. The take is both realistic yet reflexive, as camera for the film and in the film are edited together perfectly, never alienating the audience. Some reactions to EDtv could have been different but I really enjoyed the path they did choose.
Grade: B
The Empire Strikes Back: Special Edition
Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Billy Dee Williams
Running Time: 2h 07min
This has always been my favourite installment of the Star Wars trilogy. The amazing locales and new characters that are introduced are one of a kind. Yoda, the series' best character gets the most screen time in this one, as well as Boba Fett. (Fett doesn't really do all that much. I think I made his figurine do a hell of a lot more!) The planet Hoth, the cloud city of Bespin, and the swamp Degobah give the characters refreshing situations, as well as a new friend, Lando Carissean. I think I love this one the most because I could do the most with the toys that were produced from it. The dark ending is a first, where the good guys don't really win, they just survive. No need to re-do this one, its basic elements are all that's needed.
Grade: A
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