The Simpsons Movie

Directed by: David Silverman
Starring: Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith, Harry Shearer, Hank Azaria, Joe Mantegna, Albert Brooks
Running Time: 1h 27min

Grade: A-

Disturbia

Directed by: D.J. Caruso
Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Sarah Roemer, Carrie-Anne Moss, David Morse, Aaron Yoo
Running Time: 1h 44min

Grade: B

Keeping Mum

Directed by: Niall Johnson
Starring: Rowan Atkinson, Kristin Scott Thomas, Maggie Smith, Patrick Swayze, Tamsin Egerton
Running Time: 1h 43min


Grade: B-

Perfume

Directed by: Tom Tykwer
Starring: Ben Whishaw, Dustin Hoffman, Alan Rickman, Rachel Hurd-Wood, Karoline Herfurth
Running Time: 2h 27min

Grade: A-

Zodiac

Directed by: David Fincher
Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Edwards, Robert Downey Jr., Brian Cox, Chloë Sevigny, Elias Koteas
Running Time: 2h 38min

Grade: B+

Live Free or Die Hard

Directed by: Len Wiseman
Starring: Bruce Willis, Timothy Olyphant, Justin Long, Maggie Q, Kevin Smith
Running Time: 2h 10min

Grade: B+

Grindhouse

Directed by: Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino (with extras from Eli Roth, Edgar Wright, and Rob Zombie)
Starring: Rose McGowan, Zoe Bell, Tracie Thoms, Freddy Rodríguez, Kurt Russell, Josh Brolin, Rosario Dawson, Bruce Willis, Vanessa Ferlito, Quentin Tarantino
Running Time: 3h 09min

Overindulgence has always been the modus operandi for these two auteur directors, though not in a financial form. Rodriguez is perhaps the most thrifty director around, overindulging his creative palate by writing, directing, scoring, editing and physically shooting his films. Tarantino, on the other hand, has always overindulged on dialogue, violence and odes to cinema oddity. Together, these two overindulge in the pleasure they derive from B-movie films, creating a compelling, though self indulgent grindhouse double feature, which they must have had more fun filming than we have watching.

First off is Rodriguez's take on the zombie flick, "Planet Terror". The better half of the double feature, this gore fest is true to the director's oeuvre, filled with over the top action, crazy cuts, and explosive stunts. It's story arc sticks to the traditional small-town-losers-in-way-over-their-heads-as-army-base-outside-of-town-unleashes-a-slew-of-zombies, and supplies plenty of opportunities for great lines, much machismo, and sweet sweet love making. It's everything a late night drive in experience should provide, and then some.

Planet Terror benefits from some superb performances from lesser lights, Rose McGowan and Freddie Rodriguez (uncertain if there is a family connection here), as well as some toned down supporting work, notably Bruce Willis. The director is no stranger to this genre, having travelled here before in The Faculty and From Dusk Till Dawn, (a far superior use of the two directors' talents). The cheesy special effects give way to mind-blowingly amazing makeup work, and the zombie cliches wind up seeming fresh in the lens of Rodriguez. Guilty fun, with laughs, screams, and gasps, Planet Terror sets us up for a rollicking ride at the Grindhouse.

Following the frenetic pace of the first film is a series of mock trailers, filled with funny cameos, ridiculous voice overs, and preposterous premises from some of the director's most visionary friends in the genre. Any full length treatment of these films would have been more interesting than Tarantino's book end, "Death Proof".

Now, i am a fan of Tarantino, and yet i still didn't find his half of the grindhouse all that interesting. You have to be a super fan of the films he's lovingly re-imagining to fully enjoy his take on a stuntman gone sadistic. Even still, he tests even the most hard core fan, by filling almost three quarters of the film with chicks speaking dialogue that goes nowhere, says nothing, and reveals very little about the characters on screen. For a writer-director that's made a living from his fresh, original and witty screen writing, Death Proof provides very little fodder for fun.

Russell is menacing and McGowan equally good in this second half, playing very different from her role in the first, but Dawson and company are wasted, suited up for eye candy and little else. The real star of the show is the stunt driving, but in this day and age of where we've seen everything, the car chase in Death Proof seems nothing more than an ode to car chases of yesteryear. Stunning, yes. Breath taking, certainly. Mesmerizing, for sure. But worth the hour of pointless dialogue beforehand? Definitely not. Tarantino has reached a point where his love of old movies is overpowering his ability to make new ones. Or inspiring him to make new bad ones. Someone needs to say no to him, as he is starting to abuse his position of harbinger of everything old is new again, instead of creating something fresh and exciting based on hidden gems of the past.

Like the films they are galvanizing, Grindhouse has great moments, but as a whole, is truly a B-movie, best viewed on video, where you can cut to the chase.

Grade: B

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Directed by: David Yates
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Imelda Staunton, Michael Gambon, Gary Oldman, Alan Rickman, Evanna Lynch, Matthew Lewis, Katie Leung, Jason Isaacs, Ralph Fiennes
Running Time: 2h 18min

The fifth film from the seven book franchise, the Order of the Phoenix has the distinction of being the heaviest tome, the greatest battle yet, and the launching point of a number of key characters and plot threads that will play out in the series' conclusion. This all makes for wonderful reading, but very difficult viewing and screen writing.

Reading fans can lose themselves in the novel, expecting Harry to live on to see subsequent novels, enjoying his adolescent development and growing responsibilities. Film fans, however, can't invest the time needed to see the characters through their full story arcs, nor leave the theatre feeling satisfied with an installment without conclusion.

So, it is a wonder that the Order of the Phoenix manages to cram a healthy portion of the book's features while still moving along at a delicious pace, offering up enough character moments (Harry's first kiss) and action scenes (Quidditch is barely missed, as the broom flying really zooms with London as its playground). The three young leads continue to grow into their roles remarkably well, though some of their limitations are noticeable (Radcliff doesn't quite seem threatening enough when Harry's blood boils).

Secretly, as in many great "children's" films, it is the adult roles that really give us the greatest joy, and Staunton's turn as Delores Umbridge is frightfully spot on, gleefully sadistic as the bureaucratic representative from hell. Never has such rule following and attention to procedure been so sinister. The supporting cast of adults that reads like a British walk of fame continue to shine in small roles, lead by the inimitable Rickman as Severus Snape. If there were parts from the book that could have been beefed up for the movie, it was his occulemcy lessons. i would gladly have taken those scenes over the whole giant subplot.

Alas, some things have to get cut, and Kreacher's role seems to be the most omitted. Though, having read the series to the end now, it's almost a blessing in disguise as his character provides the most inconsistency in the series. Yet the introduction of Luna Lovegood and emergence of Neville and Ginny as full fledged characters really give fans and cinephiles much to rejoice about.

Darkest in tone, most quietly (and subsequently, eerily) paced, and grandest in scope, the Order of the Phoenix does a remarkable job of resting comfortably amongst its predecessors, while steering the train in an all new direction. Though not as lush and lavish as the series' best Prizoner of Azkaban, it certainly makes its case as one of the top three. A series this long is always in danger of fizzling out before its story is told. Rest assured, the fifth feature only wets your appetite for more.

Grade: B+

Snow Cake

Directed by: Marc Evans
Starring: Alan Rickman, Sigourney Weaver, Carrie-Anne Moss, Emily Hampshire, Callum Keith Rennie
Running Time: 1h 52min

A movie featuring an autistic character, that's not actually about autism. Alan Rickman gives perhaps his most nuanced performance, certainly the best work that i've ever seen him do. His character arc is integral to this sweet, though not sugary film that explores how tragedy can push and pull us in different directions.

Weaver co-stars as a woman with autism, and a child who supports her effort to live independently in a small, Northern town. When Rickman's character enters the lives of the small town inhabitants, through an unfortunate event, it disrupts the patterns that they've chosen to live by.

These habitual practices are called into question, and at times it seems that Weaver's autistic obsessive compulsive tendencies have more merit (attached to her autism) than the choices other adults make in their neurotypical lives. Like any good character study, Weaver's wonderful portrayal shines a light on what we value from our family and relationships with loved ones. The interaction between her and Rickman is equal parts hilarious and heartbreaking.

Carrie-Anne Moss and Callum Keith Rennie do great work in supporting roles, giving their roles an honesty and multi-layered angle, which fits well within the mysteries lying beneath Rickman's character's past and why exactly he is staying in the small town. Hampshire adds a vibrant vivacity of life to the film, where the adults that populate the screen seem too burned by life to exhibit the joy and exuberance that her and her autistic mother find in each snowflake.

A movie as delicate as a snowflake, yet so unique in its presentation of human responses to pain, love, and forgiveness, Snow Cake is the type of film that presents its characters so well, that you feel like you know them. In the process, you may just also learn a little more about yourself.

Grade: A

Transformers

Directed by: Michael Bay
Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson, Anthony Anderson, Jon Voight, John Turturro
Running Time: 2h 24min

A perfect example of a film whose sum of its parts is not nearly as good as the individual pieces. Transformers boasts some wicked CGI and some silly yet enjoyable performances from LaBeouf, Anderson, and Turturro, but leaves an unsatisfying feeling at the end of it all.

A movie like Transformers, based on the toys i loved as a child, should make you want to watch it over and over again. The wonder and excitement that permeates so many of Steven Spielberg's films (executive producer on this flick) is completely absent, giving way to Michael Bay's flashy yet forgettable style. He has a knack for formulating a truly eye popping experience, only to leave the viewer with little memory of what has transpired. A brilliant opportunity is missed here, as the parties involve deliver a truly unremarkable film.

The whole premise of robots changing into everyday vehicles or Earth objects, battling over a precious energy source is wide open for interpretation and storytelling. Unlike most adaptable source material, Transformers is capable of changing into any number of retellings or allegories. Yet, much like the nineties eye candy release, Independence Day, this sci-fi tale is all style, no substance. The human characters are throw away foil for the robots to play off of, and the robots are underdeveloped props in need of personality.

If there's one thing a drive-in theatre experience gives you, its an honest look at a film. Stripped of its overpowering sonic disguise and in your face visuals, a movie is left to perform on the bare bones of excellent film making; story, dialogue, performance, and cinematography. Transformers offers little of these essentials of movie making, opting instead for the sensory overload that Bay's oeuvre is loaded with.

It's too bad that Transformers is unable to switch between Spielberg's sensibilities and Bay's kinetic pacing. Underneath it all is a flimsy skeleton, unworthy of our attention, unless that attention is being bombarded by technology. Maybe there is a lesson to be learned from this film after all. Technological advancement is only as good as the character beneath that's driving it. And if that's the case, then Transformers, like robots, is in need of a soul.

Grade: B-

Shrek the Third

Directed by: Chris Miller and Raman Hui

Starring: Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, Cameron Diaz, Antonio Banderas, Julie Andrews, John Cleese, Rupert Everett, Eric Idle, Justin Timberlake, Larry King, John Krasinski

Running Time: 1h 32min

i'm one of the few people who disliked Shrek 2 for its rehash of old jokes, minus the creativity and scope of the first film. In retrospect, i don't think i gave that film enough credit, as it does have some funny moments and some good use of new characters. Still, it really lacked the magic of the first film, as the originality of a fairy tale send up gave way for a Meet the Parents/My Fair Lady premise.

Shrek the Third confirms my feeling that this franchise has run out of steam. Revisiting major plot points once again, while borrowing from buddy road movies and high school flicks, the third installment offers little, if anything original, continuing to tarnish the novelty of the first Shrek. Myers and company seem content to rest on their laurels, spouting their lines with little spark or ad libs. You can almost sense Eddie Murphy's shame as he belts out another tune as Donkey.

The introduction of babies usually means a series has run out of fresh ideas, and the Shrek franchise is a perfect example of formulaic plot lines playing themselves out. There's the unwilling hero, afraid of his power and destiny. The hero's journey and development as he embarks on a quest. It's sad to see a series that so wryly turned these conventions on their head, succumb to the same conventions without a crumb of wit or satire the third time around.

The animation is still top notch, but without the humour or excitement of a storyline worth visiting (or revisiting, for that matter), Shrek the Third spins its wheels and ends up in a swampy mess. What once was a film for all ages has turned into a film for ages 6 to 10, only they won't get the references, while the adults won't get any laughs. Save your money for all the spin off merchandise, which is getting to be more original than the films themselves.

Grade: C+

You, Me and Dupree

Directed by: Anthony Russo and Joe Russo

Starring: Owen Wilson, Kate Hudson, Matt Dillon, Michael Douglas, Seth Rogen

Running Time: 1h 48min

About 90 minutes too long, this horribly uneven film tries to play on the premise that rudeness, childishness, and infidelity can be quite amusing and fun to watch. Perhaps if it was relegated to a Saturday Night Live skit, but as a full length feature, You, Me and Dupree, much like the title character, wears out its welcome fast.

The entire cast is poorly utilized. Wilson's boyish charm is presented in such a way that it fails to charm as much as it chafes. Dillon's usually funny straight man is given a character arc that positions him erroneously as the villain. Hudson is left to be a comedic device, rather than the Meg Ryan replacement she was quirkily and cutely becoming. Even Douglas and Rogen are wasting in bit roles that don't allow their comedic chops to come out in their one note characters (though Rogen comes closest to comedy).

The idea of a childhood friend crashing in on a newlywed couple's home is neither new or novel. The Three's Company premise is classic comedic territory. So if we're going to revisit the turf, something new or refreshing has to happen. The only difference about Dupree is how three very decent actors have their winning streaks comes to an abrupt halt. Perhaps a documentary that mixes the off set usurping of recently wed Hudson by home wrecking Wilson and its parallels with the on set shenanigans would be more tantalizing to watch. Avoid this at all costs.

Grade: D+

Ratatouille

Directed by: Brad Bird
Starring: Patton Oswalt, Ian Holm, Lou Romano, Brian Dennehy, Peter O'Toole, Brad Garrett, Janeane Garofalo, Will Arnett
Running Time: 1h 50min

A rodent chef is the most unlikely endearing child's character you could think of, but the wizards at PIXAR studios have succeeded in creating a rat you will love for a long time to come.

Ratatouille is perhaps the worst title for what is perhaps the best film of the summer. Yet like many of the creative choices director Brad Bird made on this film, it stays true to the movie's concept and design. The title is, of course, referring to a French peasant dish, and plays a key role in the outcome of the film. Similarly, it is the same charm of said dish that wafts throughout the film, delectably tantalizing our movie tastes by ensuring every filmic ingredient is perfectly placed.

To begin, the animation is stunning. Now, this can be said of most any PIXAR film, but not since Finding Nemo captured the beauty of the sea, has an animated film visually breathed the essence of its locale. France is rendered beautifully in every scene, from the streets to the river to the cuisine; the eye candy is incredible.

Secondly, much like The Incredibles, Bird's previous PIXAR outing, the film never tries earnestly to cater to children. Instead, it expects the tots to pull up a chair at the adult table to enjoy the premise and playfulness of a mismatched rat and a restaurant heir, and their unlikely collaboration to restore glory to a famous restaurateur's franchise. The jokes are plentiful, ranging from slapstick to sophisticate, yet the story is first and foremost, a PIXAR trademark.

In a season that is rife with sequels (in actuality, sequels to sequels, or sometimes sequels to sequels' sequels), Ratatouille stands out as an imaginative piece, a sparkling original, a one of a kind concoction. Basically, a signature dish amongst standard fare. The voices cast are very talented, yet not exactly your obvious choice in a time when animated films have been privy to stunt casting (are you listening, Shrek?). This adds to the authenticism and uniqueness of the film, as the audience can easily immerse themselves in the world the PIXAR team has masterfully painted.

Some scenes are so realistic that you almost forget you are watching animation, while others seem to pop with an energy and action that no camera could possibly catch. The rats' eyes views are playfully exciting and exhilarating, and the food preparation so wonderfully presented that you can practically taste and smell the kitchen itself. More amazing, is how the animators have designed a rat that moves so realistically, lives amongst a rodent population so disgustingly vile, yet still manages to come across as cute and charming at the same time.

The only flaw of the film may be its unbelievable premise (a culinary rat controls the actions of an inept chef) yet the incredible animation makes the audience willing to believe anything can happen, so much so that while we're whisked along, some parts of the film seem to stall out at times. Still, for what must have been a truly hard sell, Bird's artistic vision is so refreshing, that it's a delight to take this gamble over a summer of sequels and leftovers. Not since Les Triplettes de Belleville has animation triumphed so wonderfully over any live action offering. A must see for all ages!

Grade: A

Knocked Up

Directed by: Judd Apatow
Starring: Seth Rogen, Katherine Heigl, Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann
Running Time: 2h 09min

Comedies written solely for adults are so few and far between, that when they do emerge, people are quick to praise it. When i say, comedies for adults, i mean a film that only those who have endured some of the trials and tribulations of adult relationships will find it relevant and funny. On this measure, i give Mr. Apatow and his cast a resounding applause.

However, dropping the F-bomb with reckless abandon does not a funny film make. Yet for some reason, Knocked Up thinks that a line delivered with a curse word is infinitely funnier than anything. Yet when one thinks about Woody Allen or Will Ferrell or Bill Cosby or Jerry Seinfeld or Monty Python, what can be said in front of the kids can be all the funnier for adults when we're getting away with the double entendre.

Knocked Up explores some familiar grown up territory, and deserves many of the laughs it gets. Rogan's brutally honesty lead makes for both excellent comedic fodder and audience sympathy. Rudd's character's secrets, on the other hand, endear us to his wicked ways, making us cringe while laughing and empathizing with his plight. Both men speak of their relationships in a refreshing manner, portraying modern day dating/marriage as the love/hate conundrum it can very well be.

Unfortunately, what occurs opposite this, are two female characters that seem to possess little self worth, existing solely for the temptation or torment of the male leads. Knocked Up wants to have it all; honest relationship drama alongside stereotypical and "only in the movies" scenarios. It plays both sides, well at times, painfully at others. In the end, it is overwrought and too easily wrapped up, but in between it provides some refreshingly new takes on adult life, in a way that too few films do. More plentiful than painful, Knocked Up is truly the replicated mixed blessing of a one night stand.

Grade: B

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

Directed by: Tim Story
Starring: Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans, Michael Chiklis, Kerry Washington, Andre Braugher, Laurence Fishburne, Doug Jones
Running Time: 1h 32min

i'll be the first to admit, i liked the first Fantastic Four film. In fact, i have rewatched it several times as it has been in heavy rotation on the Movie Network, and it actually gets better every time. i can't quite fathom why people (namely, critics) have taken these films so seriously, as though they must hold up a torch (pun intended) to the major comic book adaptations of recent years like Spider-Man, Batman, and X-Men.

Those films should be better than this one, as relatively, the comic books from whence they came are proportionately much better than the characters found in Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer. Which, on a side note, begs me to ask the question, how exactly does the Silver Surfer "rise" in this installment? From where? To what? Or is it referring to the British expression, "to get a rise out of", and therefore, the Silver Surfer gives us some shits and giggles?

A good laugh and some fun action is all one could ask for out of this series, and round two does deliver these to some degree. Evans' Human Torch character still gets all the good lines, and actually takes the super hero genre in a much needed direction; the super hero that embraces the gift and lifestyle change to rock star status. Chiklis still supplies the ugly side of the superhero biz, in more ways than one. And Gruffudd and Alba continue to show zero chemistry and less acting ability as their brethren, yet remain stretchy and sexy enough for us to wish the Fantastic Four truly showed us what a formidable foursome would look like.

As for the introduction of the new character, Fishbourne and Jones team up well to create the voice and body of the Silver Surfer, but i've always thought the concept was more comic book art lesson on the aspects of proportion, rather than a fully fleshed out character. His whole existence as doomsday messenger for the stars is rather silly and non-threatening. Still, the movie does a good job of making him look cool, kind of like a modern day T-2000, but what he adds by way of interesting storytelling is nil.

If, like me, you don't expect much from these four, then you'll be satisfied by this sequel. However, don't expect much and pray they don't make another, unless they go for an NC-17 rating. Now, that's a Marvel production that'd break box office AND test the skills of the CGI department!

Grade: B-

Firehouse Dog

Directed by: Todd Holland

Starring: Bruce Greenwood, Bill Nunn, Josh Hutcherson, Mayte Garcia
Running Time: 1h 51min



With a title like Firehouse Dog, one expects an Air Bud style film, complete with a dog who rides the fire truck, holds a hose, climbs ladders, and pees out fires. Thankfully, this film is NOT one of those, though there are some scenes in which the titular dog does engage in traditional fireman (fire person) work fare (which isn't to say that a film with all that excitement isn't a bad idea, wink, wink).

The movie starts out promising enough, with a wild stunt involving the dog, who eventually is revealed to be a pampered movie star with some handlers who are quite attached, with questionable but honest motives for being the dog's entourage. Once dog and handlers are separated, the dog ends up in the hands of a boy whose single dad is head of a firehouse in need of a mascot.

By now, i know you're saying, can this movie get any hokier? To which i respond, no. But it can have a real heart to it. And even though most of the performances are worthy of an after school special, especially the precocious child actor, whose presence begs for a few more open auditions, this film rises above the content to provide a family friendly dose of entertainment, filled with father-son bonding, small town camaraderie, and cute teen romance.

As much as i wanted to make fun of this film, and hate it for pandering to a young audience, i'll leave that for some other cynical cyber reviewer. Instead, i'd rather enjoy it for what it is, a surprisingly enjoyable, cute and warm family film that middle America can enjoy for years to come. Here's to the sequel, Canine Patrol!

Grade: B-

Deja Vu

Directed by: Tony Scott
Starring: Denzel Washington, Paula Patton, Val Kilmer, James Caviezel, Adam Goldberg, Bruce Greenwood
Running Time: 2h 08min

As you're watching this film you may get the impression that you've seen it once before. That's not because of the title, but more so due to the fact that it is the second collaboration between director Scott, actor Washington, and producer Jerry Bruckheimer, previously united on Man on Fire.

That was a good film, and this one is no slouch either. Both visually stylish, Scott likes to tell stories through images rather than words or sound, and you'll see a lot of info and emotion communicated in slow-mo, or jump cut imagery. This suits his collaborators just fine, as Bruckheimer is known for his worldwide blockbusters, which must translate well into dozens of languages. As for Washington, it's been known for a long time now that he can do more with his pinky than most actors can do with their life's work, and rumour has it, Denzel isn't too hard on the eyes, with or without his mouth closed.

So, what are they doing together again, for the first time? Delivering an interesting twist on the crime scene reconstruction film. Washington's ATF agent arrives on the scene of a ferry explosion in New Orleans, and through the miracle of some new technology, is able to revisit the past week to try and reconstruct the events, and somehow figure out a way to catch the perpetrator, either before or after it happens(ed).

Now, it may sound confusing, and it is quite complicated, but c'mon!, this is a Jerry Bruckheimer film. So damn the logic, and on to the action. Denzel has this uncanny ability to raise the standard fare to the artistic, and he elevates this crime film to must see status. He is aided by two of Hollywood's funnier and forgotten castmates, Kilmer and Goldberg, as well as the seriously underrated Caviezel, who is on par with Washington; no small feat.

The film keeps the viewer riveted, as Washington turns up the emotional heat as the clock ticks nearer and nearer to the moment where time has run out. Given the sci-fi element, it is difficult to predict, as anything can and will happen, yet like most of Bruckheimer's summer fare, a quaint love story is somehow intertwined amidst all the danger and intrigue, giving the preset action sequences some emotional weight.

Scott's stunts and action set pieces are top notch, and could make this a decent film even with B-list actors. Yet having such a fun and interesting cast turns this standard (and bordering on the far fetched) action film into something the audience has come to associate with Denzel: another fine, solid, and thrilling caper. He never ever seems to disappoint, again and again. Which is where that sense of experiencing Deja Vu comes from.

Grade: B+

The Fountain

Directed by: Darren Aronofsky
Starring: Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz, Ellen Burstyn
Running Time: 1h 36min


From the brilliant mind of Aronofsky comes an independent film feel of a grand science fiction love story that spans centuries in scope, but shoots with a simplicity in mind.

Reminiscent of Kubrick's 2001, as it conjures up futuristic images of space and man transcending to another form, while at the same time, delving into the past and searching for the connections which bind us generationally, The Fountain is a sweeping romance set against the backdrop of man's attempt to use science to defeat destiny and nature.

Jackman and Weisz play triple roles with much conviction, remaining consistent in each time era, while altering their characters just enough to seem like distant reincarnations. After spending much time in development hell, this film has had the good fortune to be embraced by these two leads, as they show why they are two of the better actors on screen right now.

Aronofsky's vision has always been breathtaking, and despite budget slashing and big name A-list actor replacement (Brad Pitt was attached for a long time), his revision of the original concept seems to do more with less. Minimal budgets call for creative stretching, and no one is as creatively stylistic as Aronofsky. If ever there was a director to take up the mantle from Kubrick, it is him, as this film demonstrates.

Classic sci-fi embraces a fantastical element of science and molds it into modern day fabric, revealing more about our present day selves in the process. This is what excellent science fiction is about. Using a probable future to make lessons for a better present. Not alien kill fests or time travel hokiness. The Fountain unfolds slowly, poetically, edging us towards a conclusion we wish for, but are unsure of. Along the way, little reveals are given as the three time tales converge, and each unveils more threads as it unravels.

Using age old myths and legends about the Fountain of Life and biblical promises, Aronofsky's film shows us what masterful storytelling looks and feels like. The actors are almost palpable, as the imagery matches the performances; and though not as shocking or stunningly painful to watch as Requiem for a Dream, The Fountain echoes the maturity and beauty that the director can find in dark places. Certainly a film for cinephiles, and fans of timeless love stories in a Kubrickian/Lynch style. This may perhaps be the best film ever to be shelved, cancelled, rescheduled, switch studios, slash budgets and finally get a release. It's a miracle that Aronofsky managed to salvage a film at all, let alone one as innocently sweet and alarming as this one.

Grade: B+

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End

Directed by: Gore Verbinski
Starring: Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Bill Nighy
Running Time: 2h 48min

An epic conclusion(?) to this epic series, which redeems itself for the horrible second installment, and then some. Much easier to follow (even when a dozen Depps appear), much more for the entire cast to do, and much more fun to enjoy, knowing that, unlike the first sequel, there will actually be an ending to this one, so hold in there!

Indeed, this time around the Pirate series doesn't drag despite its near three hour running time, but rather floats along like it has the wind at its back. Waiting a good half hour before we get to even catch a glimpse of Depp as Captain Jack should be criminal, yet we hardly miss him as Geoffry Rush and Chow Yun Fat chew the scene. In fact, it is Rush's presence which returns the series to the glory of the first film, and his return really emphasizes how integral he was to the guilty pleasure that was the Curse of the Black Pearl. He is the only actor in the series that holds his own with Depp, if not showing him a thing or two.

The entire first sequence hearkens back to Return of the Jedi, as the rogue leader's friends must come rescue him from his purgatory prison, just like Luke and Leia had to visit Jabba to gain release of Han Solo. Much like Solo, Depp's Captain Jack character finds his appeal in his naughty nature, and how his plans play out with a pinch of courage and a bucket load of luck. He's a wonder to watch reprising his timeless anti-hero.

Fortunately, (for us AND for Bloom) Will Turner is given more reason to exist in this film, and drives more of the story and decision making. It's a testament to the writers that they would fore go the desire to highlight Captain Jack (which seemed to be the modus operandi for Dead Man's Chest) and keep Will and Elizabeth's motives at the centre of this film.

Though, with so much going on, some concepts fizzle out, like the whole Calypso affair, which is talked up but fails to deliver, typical of a pirate wager. The purgatory Jack scenes are hilarious, and are an excellent way to answer the question, "How do we get more Johnny Depp into this one?" or "Who can make a great foil for Captain Jack, by matching his eccentric zaniness?" As for action, there's carnage galore, with just the right amount of comedic breaks so as not to experience seasickness.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End isn't as rewatchable as the first one, but it definitely proves itself worthy of standing alongside it, and thankfully washes away the bad taste that number two left in moviegoers' mouths.

Grade: B+

The Invisible

Directed by: David S. Goyer
Starring: Justin Chatwin, Margarita Levieva, Marcia Gay Harden, Alex O'Loughlin, Callum Keith Rennie
Running Time: 1h 37min


An odd little film about a teenager who dies, only to discover that he has returned as a spirit, The Sixth Sense style, to walk among the suspects and friends left behind. He learns much more about his assailant, and through the new found power to be a fly on the wall, begins to see his murder not as the black and white situation that most authority figures (cops, teachers, parents) quickly conclude it is.

This film would make an excellent short story for high school students. Unfortunately, it plays like a high school short film. The lead actor simply can't carry the film, as he pouts, shouts, and mopes around, seemingly losing much of the charisma and promise that his character is supposed to have before he dies.

His counterpart, played by Levieva, is the only character that seems to get three dimensional treatment, as much of the film's heart and tragedy come from her performance. She does a good job of revealing a little at a time, which makes the film worth watching.

Supporting cast members, Rennie and Gay Harden do as much as they can in their minimal roles, but really get lost in the Degrassi style setups, where the teens do the heavy lifting, and in this instance, crumble to the weight of the story.

Still, the audience for this film is probably the same age as the lead characters, and they may find some intrigue in the slow development of this teen tale. There may not be enough jumps and jolts for the tween crowd as other films of the genre, but there certainly is more substance to the story's imagination.

Grade: C

Ghost Rider

Directed by: Mark Steven Johnson
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Eva Mendes, Peter Fonda, Wes Bentley, Donal Logue
Running Time: 1h 54min

This is throwaway adaptation delivered as a truly silly bit of comic book nonsense, which undermines the desired darkness of the 70s superhero, Ghost Rider. Don't get me wrong, but there's a lot of diehards out there who love their Ghost Rider, along with their Steely Dan, Ministry, and Friday the 13th in Port Dover. Strangely, this film does little to satisfy those types, with Cage's Carpenters listening stunt man really messing with the take no prisoners attitude that comes with the flaming two wheeler.

So, it's a quirky take on an oddball super hero? Not quite. The story still tries to shove a bunch of the supernatural and theological mumbo jumbo that's at the centre of the comic book, which causes the whole project to go up in flames. It's a trick balancing act, fire and brimstone, stunt circuses and soul sucking purgatory. A juggling act that the source comic book itself didn't do too well.

Yet the time was right to make the film, as a superhero boom (thanks to advances in computer FX) is generating as many hits as misses in the past decade. Chalk one up for the misses, as this one succeeds only at producing some eye popping visuals, which was the key strength of the comic. When it gets down to it, the comic itself was really just an excuse for some talented artists to draw a cool looking dude with a flaming skull for a head all clad in leather and sporting some chains and a chopper. They could have abandoned the script and just digitally altered Evil Knievel footage and most fans would have been happy.

All in all, it's worth a watch for comic book/biker fans, but not many more. It's great to see Peter Fonda turn up as an Easy Rider, and Cage is his usual self, whether you love him or hate him. In fact, the cast gives of themselves wholeheartedly. As expected, Mendes is almost as smoking and blazing as Johnny Blaze himself. Let's just be thankful that there's no chance for a sequel, and this ghost can ride off into the sunset.

Grade: C+

Spider Man 3

Directed by: Sam Raimi
Starring: Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, Thomas Haden Church, Topher Grace, Bryce Dallas Howard
Running Time: 2h 20min

Anticipation being at an all time high, the third Spidey flick seems bound to disappoint. Add to that, the amazosity that was the first two films, it's almost guaranteed to not be near as good as the first two parts of the saga. And it isn't. Despite the fact, Spider Man 3 is a very good action film that delivers everything you'd expect from it. Yet unlike the previous two, there just isn't a whole lot more.

The premise is promising. Peter and MJ are becoming more like the adults that fill the comic book pages of today, and the characters of Sandman and Venom enter the fray alongside the Green Goblin. Unfortunately, you can have too much of a good thing, and this third installment suffers from the same problems as Batman Forever; too many ideas, too little time.

Instead of telling the saga of Venom, the dark side of Peter Parker brought out by the alien symbiote, with slowly increasing menace and suspense, the whole ordeal is rushed through the film, highlighted by a ridiculous musical number. Don't get me wrong, i appreciate Sam Raimi's attempt at an homage to Saturday Night Fever, but it doesn't belong in this film, or with the tone it strikes. Clever, but misguided.

What really shouldn't work is Bruce Campbell as an overzealous maitre'd, yet he steals the show, adding some nice humour at a key dramatic point in the film. Alongside the hilarious, Jonah Jamieson, these two take what little screen time they have and serve up the most satisfying moments. This is where Raimi's risks work, on a small scale. He continues to deliver some amazing set pieces, but fails to unite them with the same drama or intensity of the first two films. Several characters seem to appear simply for recognition's sake, adding little to the story or thematic elements.

Sandman is visually amazing, and played to the max by Thomas Haden Church. Like his comic book counterpart, he is a neat idea, with little behind it. Which was often my beef with Marvel comic characters; they were interesting ideas, with little relevance or psychological value. Venom defied this rule, exploding from the pages of the Amazing Spider Man like no other villain of the modern era. Yet Raimi fails to learn from the mistakes of comic sequels past, such as X-Men 3 and the aforementioned Batman Forever (not to mention Batman and Robin or Superman 3, 4, 5). He succumbs to the "more means better" misbelief of Hollywood, when in fact, the more plot lines, the thinner the payoff. Venom is deserving of his own film (and may get it in Spider Man 4) while plot lines involving Sandman, Harry Osborn, and Gwen Stacy are mere window dressing, falling far short from their importance in comic book lore. Stacy is perhaps the most miserable casting error in a long time, as Howard wins the nepotism award for sure. No wonder she refuses to audition for roles; she'd never get one if not for Daddy Ron.

All this negativity aside, the film delivers as an enjoyable, fast paced action extravaganza that shouldn't disappoint non-discriminating fans. It has the five requisite "trailer moments" of action and excitement, stays light and airy even during what should very well be dark moments of the film, and has some impressive special effects that continue to push the envelope on super hero effects work. It holds no surprises, satisfies on a couple of levels, and leaves you wanting some more, but none too soon. Kind of like a holiday weekend. Enjoy!

Grade: B+

The Good Shepherd

Directed by: Robert De Niro
Starring: Matt Damon, Angelina Jolie, Alec Baldwin, Billy Crudup, Robert De Niro, Michael Gambon, William Hurt
Running Time: 2h 47min

A fascinating journey into the inner recesses of your mind, as you slowly feel yourself drifting to sleep. The Good Shepherd is like counting sheep, only with really good actors. Robert De Niro calls in the favours and gets a compelling cast together to act out the most boring film about one of the most spine tingling moments of the modern era. Who'd have thought the CIA could be this dull?

After about half an hour, you'll be longing for Damon to get into Jason Bourne spy mode, but alas, it never happens. Too bad, as CIA agents must lead a tedious and boring life, if this is supposed to be an accurate portrayal. Despite the set ups and dialogue heavy moments, nothing pays off, as you wish you had an interpreter for most of the film.

What's really sad is that the actors remain compelling enough for the viewer to trust them to take us somewhere. Anywhere. I was kind of wishing for some crazy Kubrick Eyes Wide Shut inspired orgy during the initiation. At least Jolie delivers on her requisite love scene. Yet even that is turned into paint drying ecstasy of the worst kind.

Save yourself some time, a LOT of time, and rent ANY OTHER movie with these actors in it. May i suggest Glengarry Glen Ross or Dark City. Hell, even Tomb Raider would be a step up from this yawn.

Grade: ZZZ

Kinky Boots

Directed by: Julian Jarrold

Starring: Joel Edgerton, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Sarah-Jane Potts, Nick Frost

Running Time: 1h 47min

A fun little Brit comedy that uses a wild true story about a man who inherits a shoe factory and needs to alter the product line in order to stay in business. Done in typical Brit fashion, with feel good moments, honest dialogue, and stereotypical, but endearing characters, Kinky Boots warms the soul and tickles the funny bone.

Much in the vein of The Full Monty, Greenfingers and Waking Ned Devine, this film is fun for all and all for fun.

Grade: B

Blades of Glory

Directed by: Josh Gordon and Will Speck

Starring: Will Ferrell, Jon Heder, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler, Jenna Fischer, William Fichtner, Craig T. Nelson

Running Time: 1h 37min

Like "Sex on Ice"! Well, hilarious, wet your pants and get tears in your eyes sex on ice. Will Ferrell continues his amazing run of ridiculously funny send ups of eras and cultures that deserve to be skewered through the improv mastery of he and his friends.

Figure skating, though filled with talented athletes, is quite silly to behold, second only to other Olympic sports skeleton and speed skating. And that's for the costumes alone. Watching Blades of Glory would be funny as a silent film, just to give you an indication of how brilliant the wardrobe department is for this film. In fact, i found myself watching it out of the corner of my eye while watching two other films that i paid for at the drive in, and laughing each time i glanced at the screen. i went to see it a day later.

The good news is that it's even funnier with sound. Ferrell and Heder work well together, giving us just enough familiarity (a little Ron Burgandy and Napolean Dynamite line delivery) but creating an oddly believable partnership as two former Men's figure skating champions who get banned from competition, only to return as a pairs entry due to a rules technicality/loophole.

The film wastes no time producing decent belly laughs, by introducing the two characters in Olympic TV coverage fashion, using 2 minute bios with hilarious voice over narration, and equally funny still photos and flashback video. By playing it close to the actual competition and sport, the film gets even funnier once the leads are able to improv their way to joke after joke after joke within a serious sports movie cliche premise.

The physical comedy is blended nicely with one-liners and sight gags, and the supporting players keep the humour coming when Ferrell and Heder aren't on screen. The only setback is when a reoccuring stalker character takes the screen, as the inital joke wasn't that funny, and turning it into a running gag makes it even less funny. At least it lets the viewer take a breather and wipe their eyes dry.

i was impressed at how the film approached the concept or premise without opting for the easy, Brokeback Mountain gag, or nasty homophobic comment. Instead, the brotherly love becomes a center piece of the storyline, allowing the comedy to rotate around it. There are a lot of similarities between how this film and Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story and Ferrell's other films balanced their romance and drama, which makes the comedy much more relevant and funny.

Molded in the same manner as Anchorman and Talladega Nights, though not as consistently funny as those two films, Blades of Glory is instantly quotable and gives the audience those moments of hilarity that make you laugh out loud to yourself even when you recall them three days later. i can't wait to purchase the DVD so i can watch the pair's first competition skate over and over to "Capture the Dream!". i know i will never look at figure skating the same way again.

Grade: A-

300

Directed by: Zack Snyder

Starring: Gerard Butler, Lena Headey, Dominic West, Vincent Regan, Rodrigo Santoro

Running Time: 1h 57min

A stunning visual epic, each frame could be frozen and passed off for a Renaissance original. Strategically told, with minimal dialogue and maximum style, the machismo is palpable and terrifyingly enjoyable. Definitely a film that could be watched solely as a series of still photographs, the art direction is that incredible. Reminiscent of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, in its stripped down set design and otherworldly backdrop, this is a remarkable feast of eye candy. Full review to come.

TMNT

Directed by: Kevin Munroe
Staring: Chris Evans, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Kevin Smith, Patrick Stewart, Laurence Fishburne, Ziyi Zhang
Running Time: 1h 27min

Extremely fast paced, wonderfully animated return to the comic book roots of this odd group of martial arts super mutants. Kids will love the pace, adults not so much; yet adults will appreciate the artistry probably more so than the kids. Not a bad return to the franchise and if they continue to make animated films this good looking, i'd be afraid if i were an actor, because the craft could become obsolete. Full review to come.

Grade: B

Dukes of Hazzard:the Beginning

Directed By: Some guy I don't know
Starring: Some guy I don't know
Another guy I don't know
Some hot girl I would like to know
Uncle Jesse: Willie Nelson
Running time: 95 Minutes

A prequel to the 2005 film takes us back to how the two Duke boys met and the trouble they got into in Hazzard county. While the original film had an up and coming core of actors, Johnny Knoxville, Sean William Scott and a great performance by Jessica Simpson (if you turn the sound off) the new cast has nothing to offer. Why this TV franchise was granted a second chance in film is beyond me. Often I have wondered how the General Lee came to be, how Roscoe got his badge and how the Daisy Duke shorts were invented and now I know. I really don't need to get into what the story is or what happens, it may seem like I am lazy on this review but really I am bitter at having wasted 95 minutes of my sweet life.

If you are a fan of the show you may appreciate the origins mentioned above, but even then there are a lot of inconsistencies most glaringly the rampant use of cell phones. Never mind that they were decades from being invented but where in Hazzard county would the tower be? Maybe that can be the basis for the next Dukes movie: Boss Hogg takes over the cell towers so that the local residents can't text each other about when the next moonshine convention is. (as stupid as it sounds there actually was a moonshine convention in this movie). If you grew up watching the Dukes of Hazzard as I did it had a cool factor for its time but try watching an episode now. As hard as it is to believe it lasted 7 seasons!! Think of it this way everyone can name the car but very few people can name even one of the actors, catch my drift...BRING ON THE KNIGHT RIDER MOVIE!!!

Flushed Away

Directed by: David Bowers and Sam Fell
Starring: Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Ian McKellen, Jean Reno, Bill Nighy, Andy Serkis
Running Time: 1h 30min

A lot of fun for children and adults alike. Cheeky British humour is a welcome change from typical American gimmicks. Nice voice performances and some wild animation, even if the rats don't look all that much like rats. Full review to come.

Rocky Balboa

Directed by: Sylvester Stallone
Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Geraldine Hughes, Milo Ventimiglia, Burt Young, Antonio Tarver
Running Time: 102 Min

The 6th and final Rocky film, once again written, directed and starring Sylvester Stallone. This installment finds an aging Rocky reminiscing on the good old days and his son caught in his father's shadow. Feeling his life incomplete Rocky decides to re-enter the boxing ring and compete again after several years of inactivity. With the current undisputed champion (Antonio Tarver, Current Lightweight Champion) having no adequate competition and a computer simulation that gave Rocky the win, a match materializes.

Understandably Stallone realized that the Rocky legacy should not have ended with the humiliating Rocky V and created this as his final chapter. Really, I myself would not have lost any sleep wondering what ever happened to good ol' Rocky. With Stallone looking like a shadow of the original Rocky, (even from the Rocky V days) flashbacks to every Rocky movie (except Rocky V) and all of the "inspirational" speeches that he awkwardly delivers this movie was more of a melding of the original films. Ideally Stallone should have passed on making V and made this movie instead. With so many years in between and with so little new to say the movie is very, very uneccessary. It drags through the first half hour and he only enters the ring 3/4 of the way through the film. The fact that Stallone's own son Sage declined to reprise his role as Rocky's son should also speak volumes.

The whole premise is based/stolen from events that actually happened in sports history. First the computer simulation in the movie echos back to a similar Mohammed Ali/ Rocky Marciano sim (in 1969) which proclaimed Rocky the winner and left Ali to proclaim the computer was from Alabama. Second are the comebacks of several heavyweights after their primes including George Foreman and Evander Holyfield. Ironically it seems like Stallone is also past his prime and is looking back on the glory days where he could pull off the boxing sequences with some believablility. Even the training montage was painful to watch, the slow motion was slower than slow my DVD turned into VHS.

For fans of the series there is a lot of hope in this film but you may be better off watching the original movie as a closing on the career of this legendary made up boxer. The greatest underdog of our time came back for one last round but should have thrown in the towel years ago.

Grade: C-

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Directed by: Larry Charles
Starring: Sacha Baron Cohen, Ken Davitian, Pamela Anderson
Running Time: 1h 24min

Absolutely hilarious! High fives all around. Don't be a Vanilla Face and miss out on this one, yo. Reespeckt! Full review to come.

Shaun of the Dead

Directed by: Edgar Wright

Starring: Simon Pegg, Kate Ashfield, Nick Frost, Lucy Davis

Running Time: 99 minutes

Two friends, a pub and a bunch of zombies. That basically sums up this entire film. From start to finish it is a classic zombie horror film with a lot of humor. Two loyal friends wake up one day to find that zombies have overrun their town. From there they set out to protect themselves, their loved ones and the place they love… the pub.

This film is ripe with homages to classic zombie horror films by such heavyweights as George A. Romero and Sam Raimi. Similar to how the shopping mall in Dawn of the Dead shows how modern conveniences have turned us into walking dead, Shaun’s morning routine stays the same both before and after the transformation of the town’s residents. With so many references to other films and tributes from lines of dialogue to shots taken directly from both horror and film classics you can tell that this was written as a labor of love by Pegg and Wright.

I enjoyed the blend of dry British humor and the end of the world storyline. The jokes worked because everything came together so smoothly and nothing seemed forced. I think that if I came across a zombie in my backyard I would probably have the same sort of reaction that Shaun had. The one-liners between friends always generated a laugh. The violence always had a tinge of comedy to it so that no matter how many organs spilled out I could barely suppress a laugh. Also the running gags such as “You’ve got red on you” give a good balance to the air of gravity that these characters find themselves in.

This cast of virtual unknowns does a great job of creating characters and relationships that make you care what is going to happen to them. With horror movies you know the death toll is going to be high but this film creates a cast of characters that you are sorry to see go. Simon Pegg, Nick Frost (and director Edgar Wright) starred on the British show Spaced together and you can see this chemistry between them immediately on-screen. That relationships carries a lot of the comedy and drama throughout the entire film and gives it the feel of a buddy picture where you kind of want the guy to get the girl but want him to keep his buddy around too. The one recognizable actor, Lucy Davis of the original Office series has a good comic turn as a friend of Shaun’s girlfriend.

An amusing, sometimes funny, sometimes gory but always entertaining zombie film Shaun of the Dead definitely aims for the head.

Grade: A

The Departed

Directed by: Martin Scorsese
Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson, Mark Wahlberg, Martin Sheen, Vera Farmiga, Anthony Anderson, Alec Baldwin
Running Time: 2h 31min

Awards are to make up for misses past, as this one is overrated (which in Scorsese terms, means just shy of a masterpiece). Excellent performances by all, with some nice tense scenes. Not one of his all time bests, but a solid film. Full review to come.

The Protector

Directed by: Prachya Pinkaew
Starring: Tony Jaa, Nathan Jones, Johnny Nguyen, Lateef Crowder
Running Time: 1h 21min

Interesting film, but a little too many knees and elbows for my martial arts taste. Some good stunts and a bizarre premise, but worth a watch. Full review to come.